butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Randomize
