So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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