cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I am midnight drunk by noon
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
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I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
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Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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