I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
