A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
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