Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
i think i just lost a toe
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
