Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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