I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Randomize
