I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Randomize
