The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
