omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
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