sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize
