White coat. Heels.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
