I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
Randomize
