i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Randomize
