Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Randomize
