This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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