So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
