...so i touched it.
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
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