Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Randomize
