I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize
