You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
