yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
