i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
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