so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
