I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Randomize
