Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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