I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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