thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
