We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize