Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize
