I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Randomize
