their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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