You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
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