Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
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