Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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