We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Randomize
