There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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