I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Randomize
