We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
