Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Randomize
