YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
