Sry I called you an 8
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
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