Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
