i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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