I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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