I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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