It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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