she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
