He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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