you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
