Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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