Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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