I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Randomize
